A little insight…
My best friend sent me this one night….
Hi!
Sorry that this is so last minute. It’s kind of a no-stress paper but it is due tomorrow so I will be writing tonight (meaning, hurry back)! I would only do this to a good friend (hehe). Thank you! Love you! Muah!
Do you feel any barriers to dating non-Mormons? If so, what are those barriers?
Do you advise dating between Mormons and non-Mormons? Why or why not?
Feel free to embellish and/or add anything additional that is related.
=)
You’re awesome!
<3
Me
To which I replied…
To answer this question some background is needed. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, i.e. “Mormonism” is comprised of a spiritual belief system and religious standard of living with cultural implications that permeates every aspect of our lives. Dating is not the least of these being that the family is the very most central unit of our beliefs. Every choice we make (especially dating) and every step in the cultivation of ourselves/character revolves around the central idea of getting married and having a family. It is taught most clearly in a manifesto put forth by our church leaders called “A Proclamation to the World on Families.” In it is outlined the basic structure and execution of the “ideal” familial situation. One of the fundamental steps to creating a strong, faithful, solid family that worships Heavenly Father and radiates the love of our Savior, Jesus Christ is getting married within the LDS temple under the authority we believe is ordained of God which seals the two souls together “for time and all eternity.” Any children born under this covenant marriage are entitled to all its blessings. If one marries outside the temple, it is “til death do you part” and thus not a valid transaction in the hereafter. So, what does this mean in practicality? For any faithful member of my church, a temple marriage is the ideal and eternal goal. It’s implications are so far reaching it would be difficult to elaborate in the space given here for me to answer…so, dating someone who is outside my faith has always come with the caveat’s: “If I fall in love and all goes well….I will not be able to be sealed to this person. I will not have a temple marriage. My children will be born out of the covenant.” For some of us, that is tough pill to swallow. The phrase often associated with this predicament of being in a relationship with someone and facing breaking up over this issue is “Don’t give up what you want most for what you want now.” Sometimes in my youth I would get into relationships with less thought toward marriage and more thought toward summer flings or winter romances. But then always came the moment when I had to decide if I wanted it to be more or cut it off. And whoever dated me had to come to the realization that we either went after that dream together (meaning they would think about converting) or they would have to be ok with what I have been told felt like asking me to give up on my dream. It was always a tough thing when I was younger and so there was always the temptation to simply date within my faith and exclude that difficulty. I mean relationships are hard enough right? Dating a member was always easier because being LDS is really a culture as well a religion. However, I have never been one who took the easy road.
As to whether I advise dating between Mormons or Non-Mormons my answer is this. I am in no place to advise anyone on who they should date. You have to follow your own conscience. I will say this. Be honest with yourself. Take a deep look into your heart regarding the testimony you have around the temple and the power of the ordinances performed within it. If your answer is that you believe, then it is simple. Marry a Mormon or bust. If you don’t believe, then date whomever you find that makes you happy and treats you right. For me personally, I am still evolving. Common goals, kindness, spirituality of some kind, faith, intelligence, family oriented mindset and lots of other things are on my list. I haven’t made up my mind yet on where I stand with Temple marriage. I know how I was raised and how I feel when I am in the temple. Which is the most profound peace I have encountered anywhere on earth. I feel the spirit of God reside there as it is His house on earth. But I do believe that God puts people in your life for a reason and sometimes you always can’t see the end from the beginning. So it all comes down to faith. Faith in the temple. Faith in the person I spend my time with romantically. Faith in myself to be a good wife and mother no matter what. And faith in the Lord to guide my steps and choices to make the most of time on earth here and serve my fellow man. But what do I know? J
Just sayin…
Things move and morph. But there are people my life that I can, deep down, still feel, and whom I have so much love for even though we go so long without any contact at all. I can still feel you and I love you. Christmas is hard now because I don’t have him anymore. But I do have my friends. And I have some die hard friends. A couple. Out there. Whom I dearly love. So thank you to them… Goodnight…
Feels like a deep exhale…
Every once in a great while. Life surprises you by clicking a piece of your broken heart back into place. And the crack starts to heal. And the glittering fissure scar reminds you of the unbearable loss you went through. And sometimes, somehow, that makes it all worth so much more… Here’s to you my friend. My dearest. My ever present memory. Here’s to you…with gratitude for such a kindness you have given with your voice. Be brave. Seek light. You bring so much light into my poor little heart…You are worth everything. I have faith in you. Be brave. Here’s to you. My friend. Always.
If you are on God’s side reblog this. If you’re on the Devil’s side, keep scrolling.
i dont like reblogging shit like this, but this one got me cause of the second sentence.
Only cos I’m not on the devil’s side. Lol.
^^^^
Ditto. Although I’m such a slacker in other ways I don’t think a reblog is gonna do it. Haha. But couldn’t hurt.
Don’t ever use someone’s past against them.You’re just reminding them of the mistakes they made back then. If you watch their facial expression carefully, then you’ll see the hurt in their eyes as they reminisce everything that happened. Never use emotion as a weapon, it strikes deeper than you can imagine.
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